On last week's podcast, Dave highlighted the difficulty of picking the right Liverpool midfielder for fantasy soccer. Going into Matchweek 7, the LFC midfielder rankings were as follows:
- Phillippe Coutinho-41
- Adam Lallana-40
- James Milner-33
- Sadio Mane-29
- Robert Firmino-26
If you listened to our show, you might have thought that Dave made a lot of sense in picking Coutinho and Lallana and not playing Mane and Firmino.
Of course, then the match against Swansea started. Lallana goes off injured, and Firmino scores a goal and an assist. What's a fantasy soccer player to do?
Well, in light of the difficulty, here's our 12-step guide to picking the right Liverpool midfielder for fantasy soccer:
- Write all Liverpool midfielder names on slips of paper.
- Put slips of paper in a hat.
- Light hat on fire.
- Take hat and paper ashes to a witch doctor, voodoo priestess, or shaman of some kind.
- Tell that person what the ashes are and what was on paper.
- Ask them to "read" the ashes to see if they can "see" who the right pick is
- No, you know what? Screw it.
- Assign each midfielder a number, 1-5 or 6 or however many viable options there are since we've all lost count by now anyway.
- Find any stranger at random.
- Ask them to pick a number in the range you created.
- Listen to them. Or not. Who cares, all is vanity, life is toil, death awaits us all like a wolf at the door.
- There's always next week.